28/01/06 SUDDEN THOUGHTS

Was just playing literati with Deardeer when I feel that familar pricking pain in my abdomen again. Feels extra bloated today. Halfway through the game, I got a sudden feeling that my time is up soon. Days like this, me and Deer will just tell each other to live each day like it's our last.

We used to use Dr See's words as a gauge, estimating that we may have 3 more good years together as she once mentioned the best case study she has is a control of my cancer type for 2-3 years.

Then when the 2nd chemo drug was used, my condition saw improvement and Deer started to be hopeful, imagining we could probably have a whole life ahead of us. Till the day we get our own flat, renovates it and go shopping for furniture together. Till the day we're old, going to the garden for our daily slow exercise routine hand in hand.

Today, honestly, I feel that day may never come. I feel so sorry for Deer.

That doesn't kill my love for life though (pain does :p).

I painted my toenails an obiang festive red. You can call it the SIA stewardess chilli padi foxy sexy red. Anything. It's once a year for Chinese New Year!

I did it myself! Really dui that I didn't have the mood and energy to go manicure/pedicure last week cos of chemo. Today I bravely attempted to paint full bloody red toenails and french manicure in red on my fingers! Bravo Niki! Way to go!

It's Chinese New Year's eve, and Wawa is all dressed up already while I'm still in my pyjamas. This is just one of the numerous costumes Wawa baby owns...that vainpot~

I like that pink, looks festive too with all the embroidery and chinese knots as buttons.

Her figure real good loh. Check out that curvy waist and the cute little feet!

Every bit of her is so adorable, her fluffy ears, furry chest, bombom buttocks and graceful tail. Her face!!! Isn't that the cutest thing you've ever seen?